Tuesday, 19 March 2013

Hey, you. It's me

Hey, you.

It's me.

I'm sorry we lost contact. I tried so hard when I left the industry to track down a way to contact you, but I just couldn't find you.

I met you ten years ago, well, just over ten years ago now. I was a naive 18 year old, you were the one who would end up training me in the ways of insurance. And for that, I thank you. 

Not only that, but you were, and will always remain, a loved friend. 

We worked together for almost four years before you left the company, and I can honestly say, I'm glad you got out when you did. Things went pear shaped not long after you left.

You stayed in the industry, so with us both being part of such a "small" group, it was easy to still talk to you, email you. 

I remember that my mum, you and your sister all conspired to decorate the office for my 18th. You would have had to have been out of bed early that day, and I know for a fact, you weren't a morning person.

Some of my funniest experiences happened with you, like the time I told you I thought the dog catcher was "a bit of alright" and you kindly informed me he was your nephew. I wanted the world to open up and swallow me at that moment. I can only imagine the shade of red I went.

You're the reason for my Anne Bishop obsession, lending me your copies of the Dark Jewels trilogy. That reminds me, it's March. I should go to the bookshop - she's due to release another one!

There's more stashed, trust me!

You also encouraged me to start collecting the DVD sets of Stargate SG-1 and Dark Angel. I took it further and included Farscape, Battlestar Galactica 2003 and Firefly/Serenity.
I even have the SG-1 books!

We saw each other in September last year, in Coles. It was the first time I had seen you in a number of years. I won't lie, your appearance shocked me, but I KNEW it was you from your voice and your cheerfulness when you said, "Hey, Miss Sarah!"

That's something else you started. It's not the same when someone else calls me that.

The last time I saw you was the day bub was discharged from hospital after being crook. We didn't get to talk, but I saw it in your eyes. I'm so glad you got that fleeting look of my darling little girl. You would love her, and I know she would love you.

When I heard the news of your passing, at first, I wasn't sad. I had been expecting the news for some time. But as it sunk in, that I'd never hear your voice again, never share a joke, never show bub off to you, it hurt. You're the first friend I've lost in over 10 years. 

We farewelled you last week. You wanted us all to wear purple. So I did. And because I knew you'd laugh, I wore purple undies for you too!

I'm still sad but gee I'm laughing now, especially knowing that you've written down stories about me and your family (including your nephew) have read them. I'm also cringing but in a good way.

Where ever you are now, I know you won't make it easy on anyone. You make sure they are all up to your standards!!

Love and sci-fi forever,
Miss Sarah

Today I'm linking up with Essentially Jess for IBOT

Tuesday, 12 March 2013

A slip of the tongue

Today it's IBOT day with Essentially Jess

I know it's being talked about EVERYWHERE, but I'm jumping onto this too.

So, the Duchess of Cambridge had a slip of the tongue and said she would take a teddy bear (as a gift) for her d.......

The giver of the gift assumes she was going to say daughter. 

But what if her and the Duke are having a darling baby? Or dear son?

Why is everyone presuming it's a little girl?

Don't get me wrong, with the new succession laws I'm really hoping they do have a little girl first so that there IS going to be another Queen in the not to distant future, without her father/brother having to abdicate.

It got me thinking though. Maybe the Duchess has baby brain? I honestly don't blame her. Darling Husband (DH) and I had names (girl definite, boy tentative) and we were keeping them a secret. We wanted it all to be a suprise for everyone. 

So imagine my absolute dismay at myself with speaking with a colleague at work and I spill the names! I tried to cover, but I'm pretty sure she didn't believe me. 

But it doesn't always happen to pregnant women. It can happen to children (spilling secrets) or an excited adult accidentally ruining a surprise. Like a birthday present. 

What's your biggest, "Oh crap, I shouldn't have said anything moment?"

Tuesday, 5 March 2013

Only, but not lonely

It's IBOT day today so I'm linking up with the lovely Essentially Jess

Thanks to everyone who voted in my poll. Looks like you want to know what it was like for me growing up as an only child.

I'm an only child, but not by choice. I'll leave the rest of it at that.

I'm the child my parents were told they'd never have. 

Growing up, it never occurred to me that everyone else had brothers and sisters.

Kids would tell me I was strange or missing out.

In my early years of preschool, my best friend was a boy named Matt. I was going to marry him. His father was the MC at my wedding to Darling Husband (DH) because he is a close family friend of both families. I used to hang out with Matt and his younger brother. His parents are the only parents of friends who I refer to by their first names. Even now.

Then there was the trusty trio in grades one and two. Ezza, Mezza, and Sezza. Sadly, we all drifted apart, but through Facebook have reconnected. These ladies should know who they are. When spending time with Ezza, she had two younger, twin sisters. Mezza had an older sister and a younger sister. See? Plenty of people to hang out and play with.

Different friends over the years. But always with siblings. I felt like an extension of those siblings in many cases. Did I get lonely at home? I sure as hell don't remember feeling that way. Did I ever wish for brothers or sisters? I won't lie, I sure did. Was I spoilt? Probably. But I think I've turned out ok.

As a child, if I wasn't asking to go and play at someone's house, I was reading. Something which I still love to do today. Being an only child meant that there was only ever MY lot of book club to pay for, meaning I could order more. I let friends borrow books. I still had friends for sleep overs. 

I'm extremely blessed to have my best friend, Tegan, who is my sister of the heart. We don't need blood to connect us. We are two peas in a pod, an extension of each other. We can have an entire conversation with nothing but a few eyebrow wiggles, or on a busy day, a few little noises or even just one word each. Without Tegan, I don't know who I would be anymore. I am also lucky now to have a sister-in-law. 

But please don't look at an only child with pity. It may be through choice or otherwise. We don't miss out on things, we aren't monsters or freaks. 

Our parents just managed to make the "perfect" child on the first go! (sorry people with siblings!)

Monday, 4 March 2013

I hate ants

I guess my title says it all. I hate ants. The little blighters make me so angry.

My Darling Husband (DH) keeps telling me it's because our house is 'dirty'.

Meaning I don't do enough housework.

I'll admit it, I don't like doing housework, but I do enough so that we live in a nice, clean, comfortable environment.

Right now, I'm watching one of the little menaces climb up the wall, that's been sprayed with ant spray. Why won't they die??

I'm sick of picking them off Darling Daughter's (DD's) mat. 

It's only been since ex-TC Oswald that all the ant dramas escalated to the point now where the slightest tickle on my leg and I'm madly swatting to get them off me. Whether they are there or not.

I've sprayed ant spray, I've tried killing by hand, I've tried vaccuuming them up. To no avail.

My house is almost spotless. Where the ants are most, IS spotless, it's been cleaned that many times in the last few days. 

They are driving me batty. 

I guess you could say I'm getting ant-sy (oh a terrible, terrible joke, I know)

Friday, 1 March 2013

Socially stunted

This post isn't about feeling sorry for myself, or for anyone else. This is just something that I wanted to put out there for all to know and maybe understand a little better. And I'm sorry, it's not my readers choice post. Yet.

Having a premature baby is one of the most socially isolating things to ever happen to me. I wasn't a popular person in school, I was a nerd, but this far surpasses even the pain of being an outcast in high school.

When someone has a baby, there's always the thought of, "Oh, I have a cold, I might not go visit just yet."

And if that baby is a premmie, that is more important than ever.

You see, amongst all the other complications stemming from premature birth, there is also the added risk of an immature immune system.

For this reason, we were advised by our health care professionals that for at least the first six weeks, to avoid crowded places, places with large airconditioning systems and people who had been sick in the last week or fortnight.

This meant being stuck at home, going nowhere as a family. DH (Darling Husband) would go to work and come home. If a colleague was sick, he'd avoid them and have a shower as soon as he came in.

After her six week needles, it changed to mainly avoiding sick people and places where sick people might converge. 

Other parents didn't seem to understand when I would ask if they or their child (or children) had been sick. If their child had a runny nose, they never understood why I'd make an excuse and not meet up with them.

When DD (Darling Daughter) got sick at 4 months of age, it was terrifying. It was the first time she had ever been sick. As the parent of a premmie, my biggest fear was RSV (Respiratory Syncytial Virus). It's common in children and can often lead to hospitalisation, but it is especially dangerous to premmies. For more information about it, please see the Lil Aussie Prems page on Respiratory Syncytial Virus.

We spent 4 days and nights sitting up with DD constantly as she would choke and be unable to breathe. Thankfully though, it was just a bad cold that turned instantly into a chest infection and it wasn't RSV.

Even now, at 14 months old, I still won't willingly subject her to kids I KNOW are sick. Seriously, I don't go up to someone when they have a cold or vomiting to try and catch it, so why should I subject my child to it?

Yes, I know getting sick helps to build their immune system in the long run. If she catches it, she catches it, but I'm not going to play Russian roulette with my daughters health. You never know, it just might be more serious for her than your child. 

14 months on and it's still hard. I feel like a social outcast, never to be allowed out again. It might have something to do with the rainy weather, or it might be the fact that DD has a chest infection again, and to allow her to get better we haven't gone anywhere until yesterday and even that was a bad idea. I still have days where I feel so alone because we barely ever hear from anyone anymore, and I feel like I am being cut off from society one tiny strand at a time.

So, the next time a friend of yours has a baby, who is premature (less than 37 weeks gestation), please show a little consideration. Please don't ignore them, exclude them or make them feel guilty if they cancel on an event because they've just found out that someone coming has had vomiting and diarrhoea in the last week. Simply let them know that it's ok. You understand. Reschedule. And if they are still nervous, please please don't hate them. Don't make a joke of it. It's hard enough being a parent let alone a parent of a premature or chronically ill child. 

If you do have a premmie, please check out Lil Aussie Prems for information and their forum for support and understanding from other premmie parents.